When it comes to dating there is sometime the unfortunate break-up. In recent months I have realized that this is my least favorite part. It just stinks.
There are varying reasons and excuses given when breaking up.
"It's not you it's me."
"I am just not in a good place in my life."
"I don't want to be in a committed relationship." Turn around and married in 3 months.
"I want someone like you." Married someone polar opposite of me and what he said he was looking for.
"I feel like I will run you over and control your life " Yes I have actually used this one. Long story
Everyone thinks that break-up is the hard part but it isn't. It is the getting back out there part that is a bear
You have to start all over in a lot of ways. If you have been in a relationship longer than 3 months the likely hood of you still keeping in touch with your friends is minimal. You have spent most of your free time with your partner. Things outside of a relationship slip. (My laundry is the first to suffer)
But getting back out their seems to be easier for some than others. I am not one that it is easy for but apparently for any and all of my exes it is easy for them. They tend to find a new girlfriend withing a week of us stopping our relationship. Why is this?
I am not blaming guys so please do not think that this is finger pointing time but more of a why is it easier for for some while I am still sitting here with my thumbs tied behind my back it seems?
I have 2 theories about this and I may be absolutely wrong but this is just what I think and see.
1. Men can ask a woman out quicker than men can find out than a girl broke up with her boyfriend. I am an old fashion girl when it comes to who asks whom out. I have never had a relationship even remotely work out where I asked the guy out on a date. Did it once and never again.
Is this a reason why? I mean guys bounce back or want to move forward while women want to dwell and fix before moving on. again theoretical here.
...or is it because
2. Women tend to have a more supportive group around them to buoy them up or go through the "grieving " process with them. While men tend to not like being alone and want to move onto greener pastures.
This is all from my own limited perspective. I sit here and see more than one ex move happily ever after with their life while I am still trudging mud waiting for the guy to notice me that I sit by at church or talk to at the gym. Don't get me wrong there are many reasons why my relationships and many others haven't worked out. I do not begrudge the men in my life who have moved on and in most cases I am truly happy for them finding someone they love. But I still think it is easier for them to move onto the next relationship than it is is for me.
What are all your thoughts on this? Truly I need some perspective on this one. This is from a single sassy sister who doesn't have a lot of male friends that will be truthful with her.