Friday, August 9, 2013

Step Away from the Bitter Bug

It is the season of marriages. As much as I love dressing up and help a friend put a down payment on a house, it is a tough situation when you are left in the cold dead non-dating winter. What is worse is that you are extremely happy for them but you just wish you were the one with the dress and pretty shoes.

At times like this I tend to become a little bitter. Yes I admit I have a bitter bug inside me. It is not bitter toward anyone but the situation. What starts out as pure joy upon seeing a picture of a friend with her engagement ring can quickly turn into "Well if she can find someone..." pity party.

The slippery slope I quickly get on tends to take me to a not so happy place. A lot of self reflection/doubt occurs, or worse yet another binge with me and the Bunny Tracks ice cream fairies. All in all I think though I have realized a few things through my sugar induced coma or rant personal writings about how I can avoid the bitter bug of singlehood.

1.  I remind myself that the man she is marrying is her perfect match. Which means he and I would never have worked....not that I am ever interested in their fianc├ęs. It is more of a if she can find someone to fit her then there must be a lid to fit my pot.

2.  I go out with my friends. Whether guys or girls I surround myself with people who make me smile. Why be a Debbie downer when you could just remember how awesome you are and that you have people who care about you. Even if your not married to one of them.

3.  I call my sisters. This may sound weird but I call one of my sisters and talk to her. Within the ten minute conversation she has had children come up and ask for this and that. She lists off the numerous chores, baking goods to make, lessons to teach, or how tired she is from trying to raise a house of kids. This is a reminder of how amazing I have it that I can sleep, eat, play, or do whatever whenever I want. (Please note that I am not looking down on my sisters but appreciating that I am not them.)

4.  I look at the picture of the happy couple and imagine that one day it will be me. Why not dwell on the positive of the situation and bask in the hope that one day it could be me. I run through the things I would want to do differently, that is to say my tastes in things are different than the bride to be. But to look at how happy a couple is at the cusp of their relationship you can't help but be excited for them.

Avoid the Bitter Bug that creeps up on you. Trust me it likes to eat at your soul with some lasting scars. Don't lose hope that you are perfectly situated in life. Use the bug spray you do have like friends, family, and a shopping spree ;-) to avoid what is out of your control. Step back to look at the AMAZING person you are and that one day you will find an AMAZING lid to your pot.

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